Joyful Mother, Blessed Child

My longings through the night

Only caused bitterness by morning

Expectations piled high

Suffocated any joy, buried deep

Shame snuck in by the name of alone

The lie said you do not need community

Fear was my friend

Control was my master

FREEDOM!

What about MY freedom?

Fear said I had to harness my freedom

Control said I had to keep track

Never realizing I was living in an illusion

A false reality of the truth

The truth? I am always free

The freedom I was seeking made itself known in the servant’s heart I was avoiding

The endless loop of servant hood, I thought, would exhaust me to my core

But the more I poured out, the more I was filled up

The grace I extended wrapped back around me

The joy that was buried deep, began to rise to the surface

I allowed a swelling love I had never known before

Change me from the inside out

It poured out over my home

And my children were blessed